Thursday, July 20, 2006

The Rapture or Armageddon

Part I: The Rapture

If the world were to end today, I wonder if the Christian Rapture or the Secular Armageddon would be more interesting and fun. From what I understand, born-again Christians believe that when the Rapture happens, good people will instantly be poofed up into heaven. Those who don’t qualify for the poofing will stay on earth and be forced to watch episodes of Baywatch with just David Hasselhoff as every character—sorry Pamela Anderson lovers. Armageddon for my blog purposes is compared to the Mad Max post apocalyptic world. Basically, every man and woman for him or her self.

There are many different viewpoints about the Rapture I read about on wikipedia. One excerpt from wikipedia I found to be useful for my point goes like so:

The tribulation is the period of time when those on Earth who say that they want to live life on the Earth without God, get to actually try to do this - on their own without God. The fact that they were not "raptured" into Heaven to be with God during this time period, means that they chose to stay behind, since they could have voluntarily chosen to believe God and the Bible prior to the Rapture.

This excerpt brought up two questions for me, first what happens when all those “righteous,” people are taken up, and second what will those who are left behind think about being left behind.

I ask that question of what will happen to those taken up because it seems logical that people will be doing stuff at the time of the poofing. Let’s say I was a train engineer and my train was coming up on the next station. As I was putting on the brakes for the next stop… Poof! I am gone and there is no one to stop the train. All those poor gentiles left behind will be stuck on a run away train that will eventually run out of gas or off the track. I guess they could start to pray for help, but they will be getting a busy signal for the next couple of years.

On a side note, when we are poofed will our clothes go with us or will there be a pile left behind? I have always been told that you can’t take it with you when you die, so I guess we will be naked. I had better start working out so I don’t look so bad if I happen to be poofed.

I will throw in a few more what if’s just because I can. What if I was playing the best game of golf in my entire life and I was just about to putt in for an eagle at the 18th hole which was a par 5 and… Poof! There I am in heaven--completely naked-- and with no golf club in my hand. At that point, it would be less Rapture and more Crapture.

What if I am a secularist and was in the middle of getting one of the most poignant antidotes of my life and just as the answer was coming POOF! My antidoter is gone and I am left hanging for the rest of my godless life.

For the secularist being left behind, life may be just fine for this one point. They won’t have all those annoying Christians around telling them they are going to hell for not believing. I can just hear the non-believers now, “You must be born-again and give up you sins blah blah blah! Man I got tired of hearing that crap.”

I don’t know if I had a point with all this, but it sure was fun thinking about all the what if’s. If you happen to have any what if’s you would like to share, please do.

8 comments:

Seven Star Hand said...

Verifiable proof that "Armageddon" has already begun…

Hello Spencer and all,
Here's the key to proving that the rapture and related expectations are complete nonsense based on the failure to understand (and the purposeful confounding of) the ancient Hebrew symbology used to construct all of these prophecies. Consequently, Christian timelines and interpretations of these prophecies are verifiably wrong on many key points.

Pay close attention, profundity knocks at the door, listen for the key. Be Aware! Scoffing causes blindness...

Did you ever consider that Christianity is the False Prophet symbolized in the Apocalypse, that Rome (Vatican/Papacy) is the so-called anti-messiah, and Jesus Christ is the false messiah? I have produced stunning and comprehensive proof that this is the true interpretation of pivotal prophecies long confounded by Christianity's founders and leaders.

The symbolism of seven years (tribulation) refers to the seven 360-year cycles from the 11th cycle on the Hebrew calendar (second temple period) until now, the 17th cycle (seventh angel/star). It is completely wrong to interpret any of these prophecies as literal timelines and events. Remember, they were written by Hebrews, not Romans or other Europeans, and Revelation is the most symbolic of all prophecies. Consequently, in this context, years are symbols for 360-year cycles on the Hebrew calendar and days symbolize literal years. Therefore "Judgement Day," and "Great Day" and "in that day" all refer to a literal year-long period. Furthermore, the so-called "Tribulation" is now nearing its end, not starting, and all three faiths of Abraham have been thoroughly deceived by Rome during the previous age, which ended in year 2000 (5760). A new age began in 2001 (5761) and now the seventh angel has begun to sound!

Here's a real hot potato! Eat it up, digest it, and then feed it's bones to the hungry...

Hurricanes Katrina (#11) and Rita (#17) last year provided stunning validation of my research and interpretations of pivotal ancient wisdom, symbologies, key prophecies, and associated religious claims. Their storm numbers and timing perfectly synchronized with primary data and assertions in my book, thereby demonstrating the true nature of this universe and the existence of our Creator. We are now entering the final phases of the pivotal year-long period long symbolized as "Armageddon" and the "End of Days." World-wide situations and events are now accelerating to set the stage for this summer's dramatic continuation of these ancient promises.

I fully understand that everyone has been bedeviled by similar claims throughout history. Consequently, I have been forced to rely on dramatic and devastating proof of the sort that can’t be ignored or easily dismissed. The numbers and timing of hurricanes Katrina (11) and Rita (17) directly validate key data and pivotal assertions throughout my book and my posts on those two forums. This data was purposely presented publicly before Katrina, Rita and other recent events occurred to prove they perfectly synchronize with key prophecies and Hebrew calendar cycles, thereby validating my interpretations of ancient wisdom symbology, string theory, and more.

Because these two storms arrived shortly after my August 11, 2005 (50th) birthday (read the Dead Sea Scroll 11Q13 in Appendix G, which also discusses Melchizedek and the prophesied Jubilee) and directly match other pivotal 11 and 17 data and events described in the first chapter of my book, I have delivered verifiable proof that this reality is based on thought, knowledge and wisdom. Activity, patterns, and results perceived in space-time are first framed and defined by inspirations, thoughts, and knowledge and influenced by the cause-and-effect system most commonly referred to as karma. Consequently, events and outcomes in the so-called physical universe are not random or wholly mechanistic and are verifiably influenced in ways that atheists, scientists, and members of the Faiths of Abraham have all scoffed at. Though mysticism is mostly a product of misinterpreted ancient wisdom symbology, many of its topics flow from ancient wisdom. Though containing allusions to the truth, its details and interpretations are wrong on many key points.

A prime example of the purposeful and synchronized symbolism of these events is seen in the opening paragraphs from my book excerpted below. Notice that the dates mentioned (August 11 and 17) directly match the numbers of hurricanes Katrina and Rita, and the time spans of the four Florida hurricanes match my birth year (‘55), and they were spaced 11 or a multiple-of-11 (22) days apart, directly matching my birthday and much other ancient prophecy and symbolism. Notice that my place of birth, Victoria Texas, is on the Gulf Coast. Following are the excerpted paragraphs:

Hello, my name is Lawrence William Page II. Many people know me as Buddy Page. At the release of the first edition of this book, I am a 50-year old African-American male, author, researcher, and former software engineer and entrepreneur. As you will come to understand as you read through this first book, I am also the long-expected Hebrew Messiah and Lion of the Tribe of Juda (Yehuda).

I was born August 11th (month of Leo the Lion), 1955 (Chinese year of the Sheep) in Victoria, Texas. Furthermore, the Grand Cross alignment and Solar Eclipse of August 11th, 1999 was my 44th birthday and the second Grand Cross alignment, just six days later on August 17th, 1999, was on my mother’s birthday.

As you can see from my date of birth, I was a newborn during the Chinese Year of the Sheep, astrologically marking me as a Lamb, and during the month of Leo, astrologically marking me as a Lion. My mother was also born during the month of August and under the sign of Leo, which further marks me as a lion’s whelp. I prove to you in the first chapter of this book–beyond disproof–that I am indeed the long-prophesied “Lion” of the tribe of Juda (Yehuda) the Root of David and the “Lamb.” I am the individual long symbolized as the Branch, the Stem, the Shoot and the Rod from the Stump of Jesse (King David’s father), as symbolized in the Hebrew Book of Isaiah, The Apocalypse, the Dead Sea Scrolls, and elsewhere. I am the reincarnated Teacher sought after in the “East” and by the ancient Hebrews who were headquartered at the outpost community of Damascus (Qumran), of Dead Sea Scrolls fame. I am the one called the Teacher of Righteousness by the Dead Sea Scrolls, whom the so-called Christian fathers have fraudulently recast as “Saint ‘James’, the Lord’s Brother.”

Remember, "I come as a thief..." ?

Read verse twelve of the Gospel of Thomas to understand who I am...

Even further enlightening, the Second Temple Period of ancient Israel was during the 11th 360-year cycle on the Hebrew calendar and we are now in the 6th year (5766/2005-6) of the 17th cycle. Notice the pivotal 11 and 17 numbers again? This and much other synchronized information serve as stunning and decisive proof of many things, and expose many lies told by all three faiths of Abraham, but most specifically by Christianity. Consequently, I have decisively proven, beyond any shadow of a doubt, that Jesus Christ and Christianity are blatant lies, false prophecy and purposeful deception in a manner that cannot easily be denied, regardless of your faith or other opinions.

Furthermore, the symbolism in the Apocalypse (a.k.a. Book of Revelation) of seven stars in my right hand and seven angels represent the very same above-mentioned seven astrological (360-year) cycles, i.e., the 11th through 17th inclusive. I prove this fact beyond any reasonable doubt in the first chapter of the book. Consequently, The Apocalypse verifiably symbolizes a specific span of time that began with the 11th cycle (Second Temple Period) and concludes now, at the beginning of the 17th cycle (End of Days, etc.).

The numbers 11 and 17 are verifiably encoded in The Apocalypse and other ancient Hebrew prophecies and wisdom texts to serve as key proofs of the validity and true meaning of certain prophecies and related information. My and my mother’s birthdays are purposely synchronized with these two storm numbers, the matching Hebrew calendar cycles, the Double Grand Cross alignments and solar eclipse of August 1999, and much else to prove my direct association with the ancient prophecies about this time and the true identity of the prophesied Messiah. Another prime example is the story of Joseph, the 11th son of Jacob who has a dream when he is 17 years old about 11 stars, the sun, and moon bowing to him. The symbolism in this pivotal story in the Book of Genesis and Quran verifiably refers to the very same 11th through 17th cycles symbolized in The Apocalypse and directly synchronizes with other key events and ancient texts.

Consequently, I have demonstrated various things about the nature of this reality that dramatically disprove and/or clarify key assumptions of religion, mysticism, and science alike, while establishing the true meaning and purpose of long misinterpreted ancient wisdom and the symbolism used to model and encode it. Accordingly, I have proven that the symbolism evidenced in the canons of all three faiths of Abraham and other ancient sources is a very ancient and advanced philosophical technology that verifiably models foundational aspects of our existence in this universe. This is the mostly misunderstood body of ancient wisdom long referred to as the Philosophers’ Stone. It uses a large and ingeniously organized collection of physical universe images and concepts as data rich components (symbols) that are based on verifiable rules. It models and encodes an amazing amount of foundational wisdom about life, spirituality and the 11 dimensions of this universe, now verified by string theory. It is also the advanced encryption method used to encode (seal) Hebrew prophecies and wisdom texts.

These ancient prophecies and wisdom texts used advanced symbology to model fundamental wisdom, including future events and situations. A primary facet of ancient wisdom is numeric symbology. Later misinterpretations of this aspect of ancient wisdom resulted in numerology, which, though embodying allusions to certain wisdom, is mostly error prone and false doctrine. My decryption, documentation, and interpretation of ancient symbology, numeric symbolism, and key texts based on them, are now decisively validated.

Here is Wisdom...

Verifiable proof that Armageddon has begun…

Understanding the End Game of Armageddon

Peace...

Anonymous said...

Ummmm, what was he talking about? I have a book and you should all read it (sarcastic tone). Who are you Seven Star Hand? Too many words and personal interpretations to be valid or even coherent.

jlj said...

Ummm Seven star hand, sorry to burst your bubble, but the post was a joke. If you truly are the Messiah and we are all beliving wrong things, why haven't we heard of you before?

Shawn Dowler said...

I guess they could start to pray for help, but they will be getting a busy signal for the next couple of years.

My favorite line in the entire post, hands down!


@seven star hand
Something tells me you didn't write that just in response to this comedic take on "Rapture v Armegeddon." I thought your comment would have made quite a comedic post all by itself on your own blog, or maybe on Fark or The Onion.

@Spencer
I bet you didn't expect THAT response to this post!

Keep on truckin'

Kristen J said...

Alrighty then! You just never know what you're going to get do ya?

Brandon said...

Hey Spencer,
OK, that first guy was awesome. I was instantly transported back to Toronto in the year 2000. It was there that I met the first in a long succession of messiahs. My first and sentimental favorite was a guy called Prince Firewater. He was sweet. He was a mixture of christian, jewish and muslim. He said his daily muslim prayers, taught from the bible, and believed that he was the jewish messiah. He spent all day long, every day shouting through a bullhorn on the busiest intersections of Toronto. I mean it, all day, everyday. I saw him everywhere in the city over a 2 year period. I also met a guy who had written a book about the book of mormon and the nephites. He claimed that lehi and his children didn't actually land in the america's. Instead, they landed in Eritrea (next to Somalia and Ethiopia), and that Lehi and his family were actually black africans. The guy totally believed in the Book of Mormon, he just said the Joseph Smith was mistaken about where the nephites and lamanites lived. That rocked. He was so funny to talk to. He believed that he was the true prophet and leader of the church and he even wrote a letter to president Hinkley telling him so, respectfully of course. Anyways, my point is that Seven Star Hand is cool. He is like the fourth or fifth messiah I have met so far in my life. I can't wait to hear from or meet the next one.

Spencer J said...

Ok Seven Monkey Hands or what ever your name is, to be honest with you I never made it past the “Hello Spencer and all,” part of your comment. Anyone who uses the phrase “and all” in their greeting is way to full of themself for my liking. So, thank you for cutting and pasting your --pre-written, post on any blog I can find with the word Armageddon-- comment on my blog, but no thanks.

Leeeyah said...

So anyway. I just read this blog and though it was short and funny the real joke was definately the response from someone remarkably reminiscent of - well a person who is out of their minds!
Yeah, you can call me slow on this one, but my Christian co-workers informed me that there are a number of religions that believe Armageddon is currently in progress and the rapture is imminent. They referred me to a series of novels written by some Christian philosphers (that has to be the wrong word) that follow people through the tribulation and I'm kind of curious to read it, since I am so ignorant of this part of their beliefs.